I love the little changes you made. I think it is just absolute perfection. :) and that you dont actually have him say 'it' is just how it should be. :)
This just makes me giggle: her brow quirking as those dreaded words – he isn't surprised to hear – fall from her lips. “I don’t know what that means…” He looks at her, rolling his eyes.
and this is SO her:
It’s foreign to her and all of her previous ‘love’ encounters ended up pushing daisies before long because she just didn’t know how to connect properly with others.
and so is this:
She lifts her brow. “That’s why I don’t know what it means,” she points out.
and this:
She never understood why people referred to them as butterflies – those fluttery feelings in her stomach – as if they ever had butterflies in their stomach to know what butterflies felt like.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-27 09:26 am (UTC)This just makes me giggle:
her brow quirking as those dreaded words – he isn't surprised to hear – fall from her lips. “I don’t know what that means…” He looks at her, rolling his eyes.
and this is SO her:
It’s foreign to her and all of her previous ‘love’ encounters ended up pushing daisies before long because she just didn’t know how to connect properly with others.
and so is this:
She lifts her brow. “That’s why I don’t know what it means,” she points out.
and this:
She never understood why people referred to them as butterflies – those fluttery feelings in her stomach – as if they ever had butterflies in their stomach to know what butterflies felt like.
Great job I'm glad you posted.